The Pope Goes Soft on Dead Babies

There used to be a time when the Catholic church was bad ass and took no prisoners. For example, there was a time when babies who died before they were baptized would be stuck in a special place between heaven and hell called “Limbo” for eternity. Tough luck little ones. That’s the way the Catholic church rolled.

This went on for something like 800 years. Think about how many babies we’re talking about. It has to be in the millions just from Catholic families. Throw in all the babies who died to non-Catholic families and we’re talking about standing room only for dead infants in limbo-land.

So, when did this obscene time in the Catholic church finally come to an end? Well, it hasn’t. It still with us today. But, it looks like Ben 16 is going to go soft on infants:

Unbaptized Infants Released From Limbo

April 24, 2007 — Limbo, the state between heaven and hell where almost eight centuries of traditional Roman Catholic teaching consigned the virtuous but unbaptized, is expected to be abandoned soon by Pope Benedict XVI.

The only one entitled to sanction the limbo’s abolition, the Pope has blessed a 41-page report of the International Theological Commission, titled, “The Hope of Salvation for Infants Who Die Without Being Baptized.”Watch movie online The Transporter Refueled (2015)

What’s the deal here? Did God tell Ben on poker night, “how about letting up on the unbaptized infants, Ben. And pass the pretzels.” Or have unbaptized infants formed a 501c3 non-profit to educate Catholics about limbo along with an independent PAC where they can throw campaign money at issues like this?

My biggest worry is that this is the start of a slippery slope leading to more humane treatment of other humans as well. Can you imagine living in a world where women have the right to hold the same positions in the Catholic church as men? Or a church that recognized lifetime commitments between people of the same sex?

You heard it here first: giving rights to unbaptized dead infants hurts traditional bigoted values in the Catholic church. It’s just a matter of time.

One thought on “The Pope Goes Soft on Dead Babies”

  1. Actually, I believe the owners/operators of of Limbo lobbied the Pope to release the babies into heaven. Turns out they could no longer afford the constant diaper changing, pacifier purchases and baby-sitting fees. They are also looking forward to their first solid night’s sleep in more than 800 years.

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