The Deets

Is the RNC extravaganza driving an increase in the local escort market? The Pioneer Press took a look at the subject a couple days ago by looking at how many ads specifically mention the convention. That didn’t turn up much. However, I think the location used by escorts may be enough of a signal. Here’s a look at the daily ad count for ads in St Paul:

Looks like a bit of a lift to me. Saturdays seem to be consistently the most busy.

Of course, there could be other factors such as people running out of money near the end of the month, so they turn to additional revenue sources like this for the last week.

In this particular case, I have a feeling that more of the business being done in the sex trade is probably going through higher-end sites and agencies rather than Craigslist.

According to WSAZ News in Charleston, WV, a Kentucky woman took offense when she suddenly spotted something phallic heading toward her 3 year old daughter’s mouth. Wow, that sounds really dirty.

Apparently, Wal-Mart was selling straws in fun shapes including a shape that could be mistaken for a somewhat undersized erect penis.

A woman named Denise mentions in the comments that, had they been packages in holiday wrapping, could easily be considered bells rather than balls.

The poll on WSAZ asking readers whether they see a child friendly shape like a rocket or a “male sex organ” (seriously, the organ has other important uses as well) is currently running 2:1 in favor of kid-friendliness. Of course, put in the hands of a bachelorette party at Drink (the original fun bar?) and you could probably flip those results.

Wal-Mart handled the situation well. They said they meant no harm and offered the woman a refund. They also pulled the straws while they determine whether they’re worth carrying in light of the press this product has received.

Thanks to Cariann for sending this in.

I ate dinner with a group of friends in Vancouver the other night in the front window of a tapas restaurant. While grazing on various dishes, a homeless guy kept walking up to the window with various things he’d stolen from neighboring businesses. This included potted plants, small jewelery, and this book:

After a couple glasses of wine, we found this particularly funny. What kind of book on giving head has a cover image like that?

I hopped outside to take a closer look. Strangely, the book was filled with religious poetry.

If you’re looking for books more suitable to the title, check out:

- Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-On Guide to Penis Pleasing
- Naughty Tricks and Sexy Tips: A Couple’s Guide to Uninhibited Erotic Pleasure
- Over 100 Truly Astonishing Sex Tips [ILLUSTRATED]

Are not found here.

Apparently, there are a lot of celebrity sex photo obsessed people on the Internet today googling for pictures on Juno screenwriter and Oscar winner naked.

Who would do something like that?

Does it really come as a surprise that someone with a blog called Pussy Ranch, who’s worked as a stripper, would have had a lens pointed as an exposed nipple?

And why are people so obsessed with celebrity photos?

Also how big a celebrity do you need to be before your nude photos are worth discovering? Just look at the lack of traction Gene Simmons’ sex tape has received. I this a gender issue or hotness factor?

I blame Tonya Harding for all of this.

via Rex

Julio Ojeda-Zapata ran a profile piece in in the Pioneer Press about a locally produced (Stillwater) sex advice podcast called “Sex is Fun” that included the following from one of the podcast participants:

‘Sex is Fun’ podcast’s candid information proves popular

Jade, though a “Sex is Fun” fan and sometime participant, fears a backlash in personal and school circles (she and Kaper have two young kids). Sex “is one of those topics that really is taboo” among some, who “react harshly to it,” the 34-year-old believes.

Not surprisingly, Jade’s take proved accurate based on the example response Julio posted to his blog from John Hemlberger, CEO of the Minnesota Family Council:

I’m not sure which concerns me more: what SiF’s popularity reveals about how “pornified” we’ve become, or Pioneer Press giving it undeserved respectability with this article, devoid as it is of any moral judgment. If the subject requires a parental warning, maybe it’s not suitable for adults either.

I think it’s pretty awesome that Mr. Hemlberger managed to avoid using the term “Sex” in his letter, yet used the term “pornified” which, frankly, is a porn related term I wasn’t familiar with. I Googled “pornified” and found out that there is a book by that name for people who are interested in porn but are too afraid to look or listen. Oddly, that reminds me a lot of the right-wing’s perspective on the Iraq war.

Here’s a snippet of a review of “Pornified: How Pornography Is Transforming Our Lives, Our Relationships, And Our Families“:

For those who aren’t into porn and don’t want to be, this book is a helpful education. [Pamela] Paul manages to tell us what’s really going on in porn without forcing us to walk hip-deep into the muck.

Don’t you dare look. Your eyes may explode. Ms. Paul will look for you and tell you what she sees.

Paul also makes it painfully clear that the kind of porn so easily accessible via the Internet today is nothing like the old Playboy centerfolds (which could be characterized as Hugh Hefner’s endlessly adolescent fantasies).

Painfully clear? It sounds like Ms. Paul provides some titillating (did I just say, “tit?”) descriptions of the dark side of the web’s red light district.

My search for “pornified” also brought up a site called PORNification that explains how to pornalize movie names. For example:

The Nutty Professor becomes The Slutty Professor
Cold Mountain becomes Cold Mountin’
Analyze This becomes Analize This

Here are my contributions:

Knocked Up becomes (um) Knocked Up
XXX becomes (obviously) XXX
Lara Croft: Tomb Raider becomes (too easy) Lara Croft: Womb Raider

The PORNification dude is pimpin’ a book too.

BTW, Monday’s Sex is Fun episode mentions that they were just interviewed by the newspaper.

And they discuss having 30-Day Sex Challenges . . .

Ariel Waldman has an interesting story on networks banning a commercial that infers that condoms can be used for safe sex, but not just safe sex: safe sex . . . for the fun of it!

Apparently, that doesn’t jive with FOX & CBS’s values:

Pigs prohibited from promoting pregnancy prevention

Allegedly, the reason why the condom commercial was banned was due to the fact that Fox/CBS refuse to air ads that promote pregnancy prevention, and will only feature spots that focus on the (turnyourheadandcoughMALEcough) “health reasons” alone.

How dare a condom company promote safe sex when trying to sell condoms. Next thing you know, bike helmet companies will be promoting . . . biking . . . to sell helmets.

A 16 year old girl’s father didn’t want her dating her 19 year old boyfriend. That’s not unusual. But how many young couples in that situation end up going to a Tarot-card reader to deal with the parental issues:

Tarot-card reader accused of spying on teens’ sex

“The young couple saw an ad for Garro’s business, Maestros Espirituales, or “spiritual teachers,” in a local paper. They were having trouble with the girl’s father, who didn’t want them to see each other.

So they went for spiritual counseling Jan. 2 to the office at 2500 Nicollet Ave. S., where Garro initially charged them $60 to read their palms and do tarot-card readings.

He told them that there were demons surrounding the girl’s father and that the demons were causing “bad energy” between the teens and the girl’s parents.

For another $750, he said, he would see them twice a week and help the young lovers gain acceptance from her parents. They agreed.

In the second meeting, Garro told the teens to strip to their underwear and wipe their bodies with napkins soaked in “holy water” he had poured into a wine glass. He then wrapped the napkins in aluminum foil so that he could “examine the energy levels,” the complaint said.”

I’m not sure which is worse: paying a tarot card reader $750 or having sex in the office of a tarot-card reader as part of your “spiritual teaching” but both wreak of poor judgment.

Maybe dad’s right about this couple?

I may own a station wagon, have picked up hitchhikers from time to time, but I swear I’ve never done this:

If you read the entire account, apparently Mel picked up a 17-year old hitchiker, then persuaded her to join him in the mattress he had in the backseat of his station wagon. After a night of passionate station wagon sex, he then told her he had to get back to work at an orange juice factory and took off. No, seriously.

I’ve also never made anti-semitic comments to a cop or faxed a letter of support to Terry Schiavo’s parents from a seafood restaurant.

That Mel sure has lived an interesting life.