Milk & Porn Convenience Stores

Reidy's Market Porn Selection

I haven’t studied this thoroughly, but I’m pretty sure Reidy’s Market on 42nd Ave S at 39th St E has the largest selection of porn mags in the Longfellow Neighborhood.

This got me thinking: Where else in the Twin Cities can you find extensive porn selections and milk in the same store? Sure, Sex World and other adult stores are going to be near the top of the list for pure porn plays, but throwing milk into the equation steers toward convenience.

One other place that offers extensive milk & porn convenience is Loon Express at Lyndale & 28th. You can also top off the tank there and review your new mag while getting a car wash!

Perhaps I’m a cyber snob, but every time I see a rack of porn mags these days I think, “People still buy magazines?”

Do you have a favorite Milk & Porn convenience store in your ‘hood?

What Will Porn Actresses Do?

The Long Tail of Porn.

What Porn Actresses Will Do
Larger version.

I was doing some research on a porn talent agency’s website the other day when I discovered a really cool interface that allows users to filter the actresses based on what sex acts they’re willing to do on film.

There were 901 actresses in the system. Toggling on/off the buttons for various sex acts showed what these ladies are willing to do. I kept a log of how many actresses would do each sex act then ranked the popularity of each act to create the chart displayed above.

A few things I learned:

1. “Solo” is obviously number one. You have to be willing to take off your clothes to be in porn.

2. “Girl / Girl” outranks “Girl / Boy” See, it’s hard being a guy.

3. While G/G beat G/B, B/B/G beat G/G/B. Who knew?

4. Second least popular sex act: Acting!

5. No girl does everything.

That’s all the analysis I’m going to provide on the off chance that I decide to run for senate some day.

Raw data:

Book recommendation: How to Make Love Like a Porn Star by Jenna Jameson

Video Rental Diversity in Longfellow

In an era when we’re seeing extreme specialization in Minneapolis businesses to the point of having both “Irish places with a European touch” and “British Isles style taverns” it’s kind of refreshing to see a few businesses hanging onto more generalist principals.

For example, Video Lease on East Lake St is promoting the fact that they offer Adult AND Regular movies:

Adult & Regular Movies

So you can skip the trip to the purist Blockbuster on your way back from Sex World. Get ‘er done in one stop at Video Lease.

Gay Bomb Bombs

Gabe tipped me off to this one. Did you hear about the proposed plan to build a “gay” bomb that would somehow turn opposing troops gay, which somehow would make them incapable of fighting?

Hmmm. How could this possibly work?

We have people of the opposite sex who are attracted to each other today yet can destroy any country we choose at a moment’s notice. Putting them back together is another thing.

Just because people were homosexual doesn’t mean they’d be attracted to each other, just like there are many people of the opposite sex that I’m not attracted to. No, I won’t name names.

Wouldn’t a much more effective non-lethal weapon be a porn addiction bomb? That would have the potential to effect men and women regardless of their sexual orientation (important, since many countries actually allow gay troops into their ranks).

While this could backfire in the long term due to increased forearm strength of the opposition, in the short term, it could distract them long enough to allow our troops to mount a phallic Iwo Jima (or an exposed Lady Liberty) in their city center, causing their armed forces to collapse in exhaustion. A corresponding sanction on personal lubricants would be the key to V-I-C-T-O-R-Y.

Kosher Porn is Not “Kosher” with Kosher Crowd

Via, Citypages Blotter, and TMZ.com, I see that porn gets no respect from Rabbis. Apparently, porn can’t be Kosher Certified. Who knew?

Rabbi Yells “Cut!” Over Porn Flick – TMZ.com

Yesterday, Tight Fit Productions of Van Nuys, Calif., the purveyors of “Assraelis,” which was shot entirely in Israel with all-local talent, and in Hebrew (with, uh, English subtitles), received a cease-and-desist order letter from a lawyer representing Rabbi Yehuda Rosenbaum of KOF-K Kosher Certification, a New Jersey company that puts its stamp of approval on Kosher goods. Tight Fit’s DVD-cover claim of Israeli authenticity is accompanied by a Hebrew letter normally reserved for rabbi-ordained meats, grains, and other foodstuffs.