The Deets

1. Wine bottle pumps for saving wine that should be consumed now.

2. Gas station pumps that ask 10 questions before they let you pump gas.

3. Penis pumps - (Yes, that is a link to penispumpwarehouse.com)

4. The shoes on unstable walking surfaces, like St Anthony Main’s sidewalks.

5. Technotronic: Pump Up the Jam

1. Lost their cell phone number
2. Lost your cell phone
3. Cell phone battery died
4. Cell phone is somewhere where you know where it is but it’s not with you
5. Didn’t really want to call them back anyway

I’ve been told by a few list lovers that I don’t publish enough lists on The Deets. I aim to please, so I’ve crafted a response to their plea.

This is a list:

5-Things You Shouldn’t Buy Used

1. Feminine hygiene products (most of the time)

2. Clam chowder (most of the time)

3. Male escorts (most of the time)

4. Improvised explosive devices (most of the time)

5. Bloody pit bulls (most of the time)

It was suggested to me that I should fill this out. I’m trying to get away from clogging up my inbox (and yours) with email forwards, so I’m taking this to the blog:

JUST TWO THINGS
Send this back to the person who sent it to you and the rest of your friends!

Two Names You Go By:
1. Ed
2. Uardo (short for eduardo)

Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1. Wright Socks
2. Patagonia (PataGucci) boxers

Two Things You Would Want (or have) in a Relationship:
1. Challenges
2. Laughter

Two Things you Like to Do:
1. Go out with friends.
2. Travel to new places

Two Things You Want Very Badly At The Moment:
1. Guitar skills
2. To pee

Two Things you did Last Night:
1. Partied with ex-coworkers
2. Loaded Spanish lessons onto iPod

Two Things you Ate Today:
1. Dried mango slices
2. Brats on the grill

Two People you Last Talked to:
1. Carly
2. Gabriel

Two Things you’re Doing Tomorrow:
1. Working
2. Going to MinneCamp

Two Longest Car Rides:
1. St Paul, MN to Prudhoe Bay, AK
2. St Paul, MN to Bend, OR

Two Favorite Holidays:
1. Halloween
2. Forth of July

Two Favorite Beverages:
1. Beer (any)
2. Diet Coke

Two Things About Me that you may not have known.
1. I hate running
2. While I love Nachos, I have no idea how to pick out a fresh avocado at the grocery store.

Two Jobs I have had in my life:
1. UPS Truck Loader
2. Golf Driving Range ball pick-up driver

Two Movies I would watch over and over:
1. Caddyshack
2. Office Space

Places I have lived:
1. Green Bay, WI
2. Fairbanks, AK

Two of my Favorite Foods:
1. Nachos
2. Cheese & Crackers

Two Places I’d rather be right now:
1. Biking the Pacific Coast Highway
2. A Jucy Lucy Restaurant

Two people I think will respond:
1. Jackalope
2. The Freets

Now, here’s what you’re supposed to do… if you so choose… Hit forward, delete my answers and type in your answers. Then send this to your friends INCLUDING the person who sent it to you. The idea is that you will learn a lot of little known facts about your friends.

Or, since this is a blog, copy/paste, and fill in your own answers in the comments.