Peak Bladder
I turned 35 today, which is a kind of meaningless milestone. For at least 10 years now, I’ve been able to legally drive, vote, drink and rent a car. And I jumped the gun on my first free prostate exam due to a family history, so I achieved no major milestone that I’m aware of today.
However, I did spend some time thinking about peak bladder. At some point in my life, I’ll reach a point where my bladder will start to lose elasticity, or other parts of me such as my prostate will start to grow in a fashion that restricts my peak bladder volume. At that point, remaining days will involve earlier seal breaking and more frequent, shorter trips to the can.
While this isn’t exactly great news, I’m not giving up on life over bladder volume.
From what I can tell, I haven’t reached peak bladder yet. However, I have a hunch based on conversations I’ve had in bars with people not that much older than me that I’m close to reaching peak bladder.
So, for those of you in the know, what can you tell me about this situation? Have I reached peak bladder yet? Is it ovious when one does? What changes do you make to your lifestyle once you do?
March 9th, 2009 at 12:06 am
35? You’re just a baby. And here I’m following your blog because I thought you had a good decade on me. Now that I know I’m your elder, I feel somewhat comfortable imparting advice, even though your online voice often puts you well beyond me experientially. So here it is: Your bladder should hold out for several more years. You’re a freshman to my senior, and I’m still a hearty camel, even after a sixer of Premium or Summit Maibock. Water seems to flow through faster than it did a decade yonder, but that’s a good thing. Boys our age need that cleansing. Happy birthday, and keep up the damn fine writing. Your average potty breaks won’t interfere with your muse.
March 9th, 2009 at 8:18 am
I don’t know much about bladders. However, you are now old enough to run for president. That’s about the only thing 35 does for you.
March 9th, 2009 at 9:30 am
Fortunately, once you become president someone will empty your bladder *for you* so you don’t even have to worry about it. Happy birthday!
March 9th, 2009 at 5:36 pm
Ed, I have had the same fear you did, some years back when I was younger than you are now (I’m currently 41).
I had a period where I honestly thought I was turning diabetic, due to umm… shall we say, “frequency”?
Instead of going to the doc as I should’ve, I actually just cut back sharply on sugar and used replacements instead. While this appeared to help, it didn’t remove my “frequency” issue.
At some point, however, I realized I wasn’t diabetic. Not in the least (used one of my brother’s test kits). I tried cutting back on caffeine and realized that was it! Lots of caffeine often means lots of trips to the bathroom. Not for everyone, and not for me when I was younger, but definitely now that I’m older or during periods when I’m taking in a lot of tea, soft drinks and such.
Now, no problemmo!
Sometimes it’s not aging, it’s just sloppiness with other habits.
March 9th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
Silver has it right. Your volume and type of intake is more likely to have an impact on your bladder.
Though I just passed 60, I can’t offer personal advice, due to the massive amounts of diuretics I’ve always ingested, except to say having to piss more than average keeps you alert to your surroundings. For you, Ed, that should not be a problem at all.
March 9th, 2009 at 9:55 pm
You worry too much old man, just keep peeing that steady stream and relax…or is it relax and keep peeing…whatever…Happy Belated Birthday…or is it Belated Happy Birthday…see, when you get older, there are other things to worry about than frequency issues…or is it frequency issues is what you worry about when you get older…whatever…interesting ad roll though.
I knew I was missing something…Later birthday boy!
March 10th, 2009 at 5:22 am
If nothing else, this post gets great Google Ads being served up. Reminds me of some of those FloMax commercials that start, “Here’s to men…”….and then shows lots of guys in there 40′s, 50′s, 60′s high-fiving, riding bikes, etc. That’s how good life can be when you can pee.
Anyhow, if you start to feel the slightest change in your bladder’s function, take the American path…no change in lifestyle, but look for a medicine you can go on for life to fix it! Hell – chase that medicine down with coffee, tea, or beer.
March 11th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
wait – one can get a free exam? i’d love to know why i pee so dang much. got the caffeine message here – any other possible non-medical remedies?
October 12th, 2009 at 2:56 am
Hah, this is a pretty funny post. I turned 35 today (just 10 months behind you), and was doing a quick web search for the milestones “drive, vote, drink, rent a car, Run for President!”
This one came up.
You know, I honestly had not even considered ‘bladder’ issues at my age. I don’t like that I’m half-way to 40, but whatever.
A friend of mine lost her father to a very fast moving and very rare bacterial infection. He had what seemed like a cold, which got progressively worse until he was weak, confused, and his system began shutting down. He was admitted into the hospital with a 20% chance of survival, and passed away a couple of days later.
Why am I mentioning this? Because this man had been very healthy, athletic, and young-at-heart before he contracted this rare disease. The deterioration literally happened over the course of 2 weeks — As I think back to this, it reinforces a realization for me: The only alternative to growing old is dying young.